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Mommy Hood - rescuing the child in us all
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| Life sucks in so many ways, for so many days, but I will survive |
[19 Dec 2011|11:33pm] |
It is funny how at the same time that I am getting praise about my performances and brain power at school. I have been asked by Spencer's teacher to do my student teaching with him. I was very surprised when he asked but I have impressed him.
At the same time...
My skin hurts all the time. I want to cry for hours today over my pain. I broke down this morning and asked the doctor for a medicine for my nerve endings. I need to not hurt anymore. I look horrible. My skin is just ruined. The guttate psoriasis has just killed my skin. I am on month 5 of this and only part of my face has cleared up. My ears are now flaring up too. I just hurt everywhere. Normal skin has a 30 day growth cycle. Mine has a 3 day cycle, that is so much growth so fast. Ouch!
But I keep going through fatigue and pain.
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| Think I'm done |
[07 Jul 2011|09:17am] |
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So I think I am done with my undergraduate degree. I want to see the piece of paper before I believe it.
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| Done with it |
[19 Feb 2011|10:55am] |
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mood |
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 stressed |
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Sick......
I am sick of being sick. I am sick of being mega stressed. I wish I could just be healthy for a month. I wish I could be less stressed for a month. I have so many little things to do but my head cold and chest cold is just driving me back under blankets all the time. Even my nose is killing me.
I cannot graduate in May like I expected. It is my own damn fault. I trusted an advisor and did not go to a counselor last semester to verify it all. This seems to put everything on hold. I have decided not to apply to San Francisco State because of this new graduation date.
I still plan to apply to Santa Clara. I am also going to look into Notre Dame De Namer (Sp?). They seem to have better start and stop dates.
I have also considered finding a job once I graduate. If trekki isn't working by the time I graduate I might push off my credential and find a job that puts food on the table and and keeps our healthcare. Our healthcare will run out in June at the latest.
Just so many decisions.
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| On the way to grad school |
[16 Jan 2011|11:24pm] |
Today I finished drivers ed online for the ticket I got. My first ever ticket.
I also worked on my resume and sent out 3 emails requesting letters of recommendation for grad school.
Tomorrow I am going to work on a big sewing project of mine at least I hope.
I've been sick for about half of the time I've been on this break from school. School starts in a week so I need to get healthy. I just want to sleep for a full day straight but that won't work as long as I have a kid.
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| Surviving with a little fun thrown in |
[31 Oct 2010|05:34pm] |
I'm surviving the semester, I should be studying more but I'm having a hard time of it.
We have had three weeks of visits and events.
Our friends got married two (or three) weeks ago, spencer, Joe and I all had fun. The next day we had another event.
The week after the wedding, my inlaws came for a day. I took my MIL to pre-school.
We spent the weekend after this going to two parties but otherwise laying low.
Tuesday after this, Joe had a minor surgery. We have been post op-ing since but that does not keep things from being busy. I had a major paper due this same week.
Saturday the 23rd, we went to a house warming party.
I had a friend come into town Tuesday and Wednesday the week after this. She helped us clean up a part of our apartment that we were having trouble taking care of. Her visit also let Joe and I to go to a preschool night class together. It was like a date and since he was still post op it was all he was up for.
Friday we all got allergy tested. This was a trying experience for kiddo but he survived. We confirmed out allergies and will be making an action plan for the asthma problems we are all having.
This weekend, we had a moms club party, another visit with the inlaws, and today is halloween.
Next week is Joe's birthday. and the weekend after that we are having a sleep over at our house. Three kids including spencer.
All of this business, I feel tired all the time. I am trying just take it one day at a time.
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| Pictures from vacation |
[12 Aug 2010|07:59pm] |
These are pictures from this summer. I had tons of fun since I did not need to take classes.
Here
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| Did not do it. |
[30 Jun 2010|09:50pm] |
I did not run today. My legs really hurt. So i stretched, took advil, a hot shower, and picked more plums. I cooked apricot/plum jam today. We will use it for cookies, cakes, on pancakes, and in sandwiches for the next few months.
Yum.
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| I ran today |
[29 Jun 2010|11:03pm] |
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I hope I do it again tomorrow. I ran/walked 1/3 of a mile. I only did it once. I hope to do it twice tomorrow and then add a 1/3 when i can. I only have hopes on this in case my laziness gets in the way.
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| A moment to remember and randomness |
[11 Jun 2010|10:42pm] |
We took spencer to our Kaiser appointments on Tuesday. He did pretty well during my visit sitting in the waiting room with Trekki. During Trekki's visit I went outside and got a coffee for me, a cookie for kiddo and we enjoyed the fresh air. I let him run sprints when no one was walking near his set sprinting path. During one of his cookie breaks from running he point to a man in a wheel chair who was behind me.
"Mommy, is that man dead?"
Looks at man. "Noo honey, he is just really sick."
"But his mouth is open and he isn't blinking, are you sure he isn't dead?"
"Spencer, he is not dead. Your question is upsetting his friends. He is just very ill."
Spencer thinks about this, looks at the mans friends who were clearly trying not to look back at him.
"Why is his mouth open, mommy?"
The man looked as though he had a pretty severe stroke. He was fairly unresponsive except for some head jiggling. "Spencer something happened in that mans head that made his body not want to move anymore. He might get better someday if his body heals, then his mouth might close again, he might not. I do not know.
Spencer looked again and said to the friends of the man. "Can he talk?"
The younger people with the man, said "No"
I looked at Spencer and said, "It is always okie to ask people questions as long as you are nice to them. It is also okie to learn about why people are sick. Never be afraid to ask, and Never be afraid if someone looks sick.
Spencer shook his head. The younger man with the old stoke victim smiled at me. I nodded my head back to him.
I was aways afraid of people in wheel chairs because I was told to never ask about them and to just shush. I do not want my kid to be that way.
As for me, I am getting healthy slowly. The pain in my body is still in my chest and back but it is moving through different muscles. It seems to depend on which bra I wear as to which muscle will hurt. I find the whole thing odd. I can't seem to find a non hurty bra, and not wearing one hurts just as much in a different spot. I want to try to go to the gym on Tuesday while spencer is at school. I plan to try to work out for 20 minutes and see how I feel. I hope I can build my way up from 20 minutes but we shall see. Until then I have been out walking with friends, at parks, fabric stores, etc. each day to get my stamina back up.
I really want to get below 200 pounds by the end of the summer. It is a lofty goal. It means 26 pounds in 3 months but I think I can do it if I work out 2 hours per day. My hope is to run, pedal, walk, yoga, and swim my summer fun like a pro so that I do not feel like it is work. That plus limiting my pasta's and breads, and increasing my veges and fruits will help. I also need to stop the fast food and sodas that are starting to plague me again.
Being below 200 pounds would be amazing. Each pounds of extra weight is really weighing me down lately. It is time to fix it all.
My friends have been amazing to me lately. I just can't completely put into words how much I love and appreciate them. I am a very lucky person right now.
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| Summer Squash options |
[05 Jun 2010|09:15pm] |
I am huge squash fan. I love it. It is a very versatile food which can taste totally like itself or can be filler and can take on the taste of other foods.
My current favorite squash quick fix is a grated squash hash. It does not get crunchy like a potato hash pancake.
I grate the amount of squash I want. It is a very wet vegetable and will cook down so grate double the amount you want to eat. You will end up with just the right amount since it tends half itself with wetness. I add an egg, and seasoning.
I cook the whole thing with EVO but any oil would work. Since squash takes on its surroundings, then peanut oil or chili oil would give the flavor a great kick.
I know a lot of people do not like summer squash or zucchini due to the texture. My suggestion ... cook it less. Keep it crunchy. Marinate it. And cut out the center (which tends to be the texture culprit.)
I also use summer squash for:
Grilling
Pasta's cold and hot
Stir fry's
sauté's
I add them to omelette's
One more recipe:
Like risotto but any rise can be used
Cook rice on stove as per your instructions. During the Last 5 minutes throw in grated squash, stir twice then close up lid and let it finish cooking. Add 3 tablespoons soft cheese (goat cheese is my favorite). Add 4 Tablespoons grated Parmesan or Romano. Stir well. Let sit for 5 minutes, then serve.
If you have a favorite squash recipe, then please share. I will tag this if I can figure it out.
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| Drawings and school work |
[02 May 2010|08:20pm] |
Spencer draws so much right now that he had filled 3 100 page notebooks. He draws people, fish, monsters, plants, planets. He has added stickers to these books. His media is crayons, pens, and dot paints.
He is also coloring color pages in color activity books as he goes. I think he spends at least 1 hour a day doing coloring and drawing.
School work - I am in the hardest class of my life. Every time I feel like I have it down, then I get slapped down by my teacher. I have met with her 3 times and I think she is just done with me. She told me I was waisting her time when I started questioning her about the mark ups the last time we met. It was very frustrating and I feel like an idiot. This class makes me feel like an idiot.
At this point I need to write up a peer review to turn in. I need to finish the final paper which will take me 3 hours, less if I get help. And give a presentation for the project. All of this is due on Wednesday.
Ugh!
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| Exhausted to the bone |
[12 Mar 2010|07:05pm] |
I am so tired. After 3 weeks of way too hard studying, my brain fell out of my head. I am done with studying for 3 days. I will resume Monday. I really want to sleep for 24 hours but will have to settle for my nap today and going to bed at 11 tonight. I have all my family and the inlaw family driving in tomorrow plus the whole party pack of kids and their parents.
I have to get up by 9am to make the cake tomorrow. I have made the cake already but the frosting and middle layer needs to be made and put together. Our house needs to be clean (MAGICALLY) so we can fit all the family after the party is over. I might just set up tables and chairs in the car port and sit outside to visit while cold people can go hang out inside. UGH!
I am looking forward to seeing everyone my school schedule just sucks.
The funny thing is that from now on I do not have as much stuff due per week. Next week only 2 papers are due. But I have to start a third paper which needs to be 6 pages long at least. (i have two weeks to work on it.) I also have a test next week which I can use a cheat sheet on. Yay!
I just have so much due. I really need help with my it review, I already know I need more info and the whole thing is short by at least 2 pages. UGH!
I am just so tired.
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| Procrastinating in sickness |
[23 Feb 2010|12:25pm] |
I am sick and procrastinating. I have about 7 case studies to read and hopefully get some good data from. I have a 5 page rough draft background paper which will include a narrative literature review in it. I only have 1.5 pages so far It is due tomorrow night. I also have two chapters to read and all my class notes to go over.
I am sick and i hurt, my brain sucks. I would much rather just lay in bed all day. I wish teachers took that excuse. "Sorry i did not study for exam, I was sick.' hahahaha
Spencer is super excited about his b-day party. He called and invited his grandparents both sets in person. He is just so excited.He is turning 4, he wants a jungle theme and because it is NOT star wars or other commercial kids stuff so I am buying lots of jungle stuff. I am very excited.
I have no idea what to get him as a present. I am leaning toward nothing. He has toys he does not play with and he refuses to allow me to toss out. We have moved away from electronic toys except for the wii. It occurred to me the other day that spencer has two electronic keyboards and that is it. I am pretty impressed with this fact. As for the wii, he gets to play wii fit plus any time he wants but he rarely asks for it. He gets to play mario or star wars with daddy and that is only about 2 times a week for about 1 hour.
I need to cut down on the tv but I will be more active about that this summer.
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| Overwhelmed and Under whelmed |
[08 Feb 2010|11:06pm] |
I am very overwhelmed by this semester. I am still on top of things but these classes are hard. I have also been working out anywhere from 20 minutes to an hour everyday. I need to get healthy. I have a goal of loosing a dress size every 3 months if possible.
I've also been underwhelmed with myself lately. I have not been doing well at keeping myself under control. I keep saying things I should not. I keep acting in ways I should not and it bugs me.
I need to get myself under control with both of these.
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| Typical vs atypical development of a child |
[05 Feb 2010|11:24pm] |
Typical development of any child from birth on would include hitting milestones of other children his/her own age within half a year of each other. Milestone such as walking, and talking have well documented time lines for each gender. As long as a child hit those milestones within 6 months of the average for his/ her gender then the child can be considered typically developing for this particular milestone. Some children hit each milestone perfectly on time and then will be delayed on one particular one, like saying the "Da" sound. This child's inability to say the "Da" sound 6 months to a year after typically developing children can be considered atypical.
Since a typically developing child is considered typical by hitting the milestones of development at the same time as other child his/her own age and gender; atypical development would be the inability to hit the milestone for a particular event such as walking. A female child who has not said her first word by the age of 2 is considered atypical within the developmental milestone of talking since females typically speak their first word by 12 months of age.
A child who shows signs of being atypically developed in multiple areas should be given a consultation by an expert to check for a disability. For example a child who has delayed speech, delayed large motor skill development, and equilibrium problems shows signs of a sensory disorder but until said child is seen by a professional in the field then a diagnosis can't occur and the child will not getting help.
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| Art development and large motor skills |
[24 Jan 2010|05:48pm] |
Spencer advanced with his art development. He now draw big heads with eyes, noses, mouths, hair, with a stick body. He does amazing with it. I love watching the advancements. I was so proud when he figured out circles and now he can do people!
Everyone will be getting a valentine this year from kiddo. A stick figure. :)
I love the wii fit plus. I have worked out for 3 days in a row and feel good. I am setting my goals low since I am not dieting yet. My goal is to lose 1/2 pound every two weeks. That is 1 pound a month. I plan to up it as my exercise tolerance builds.
3 days of 30 minutes so far. I actually ran twice with spencer today. I love hula hoop, kung fu, and penguin tilt. It all just makes me happy.
First major goal for me is 3 weeks of 30 minute work out everyday. Once in the habit... I will add more time as I develop. The I will start dieting. I have a real hard time dieting during the winter. I will start limiting my sugar soon.
Since new years I have gone to fast food 2 times. That is it. It is really good for me. I have also only had 10 sodas since new years. Yay.
I am trying because I want to be able to enjoy moving again. I want to go do a marathon day at the museum without stopping every hour for a coffee break. I want to run around the park with my kiddo.
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| Concepts of numbers and time |
[18 Jan 2010|04:09pm] |
I've been pretty impressed with spencer as of late. He really wants to learn to read. But more so he has figured out a great concept of time, money, large numbers. His concept goes something like this:
2 minutes - means when I'm ready.
10 minutes is a long time.
10, 40 is a short amount of money / time, this is considered a small amount to him.
40, 40 is a long amount of money / time, this is a very large amount to him. Only things really worth it are worth a 40 40 declaration.
His concept of 1-20 when doing math is coming along, especially 1-10.
He know the concepts of the days of the week and the names for them but can't quite grasp them in a large scale concept like if we look at a calendar.
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| unexpected days .... |
[11 Jan 2010|05:00pm] |
Today is an unexpected day.
Spencer made me turn the tv off for "quiet time."
I moved the furniture in my apartment around after only considering it for 1 day. (this is really unlike me)
A friend of mine just admitted to being pregnant.
I started off making beans to re-fry for burritos and am now making chilli soup with spinach thanks to spencer's suggestions.
Just one of those days.
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| Ladies Night |
[09 Jan 2010|11:25pm] |
I got to have a ladies night tonight with some good friends. We went to a new restaurant which I enjoyed very much. We all had a great time.
Then I came home and ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif?v=92.1) trekki showed me a new game on wii called World of Goo. Very fun.
Now we are looking at the wii fit plus stuff for the plus we plan to buy.
I really want to take spencer for a walk tomorrow while Joe watches football.
We will also go to Target to buy transformers since spencer has been in underwear for a week.
Yay!
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